Damn, we had Berklee's head referral and he suggests doing a helmet. With his trained eye he can see a difference in her ears and the back of her head. But, I guess without a trained eye you can see the difference in the back of her head. I am trying to be OK with this.
This is how I feel...
Irritated- that they pushed our appointment back a month, she would already be wearing it now, had they not rescheduled us. And the specialist said it's a rush to get it on her before her next big growth spurt at 9 months; tomorrow she will be 8 months and we haven't been fitted yet.
Sad- that she has to wear one. She is only 8 months so she won't know if anyone is looking at her funny or snickering at her, but I will; and it will break my heart.
Guilty- This is the one I struggle with the most. Is it my fault that her head is flat on the left side? Did I not hold her enough? Let her nap too long? Take her to too many places in her car seat? I am a stay at home mom, and her head is flat. Did I not do enough? GUILT. We purposely placed objects/toys to the right of her so she would have to lay that way, we did physical therapy and stretches, we positioned her differently in her crib, even tried supervised tummy naps. When I say "we" I mean mostly "I". I feel like I failed her.
I also feel guilty because I do not want everyone to see her in a helmet. My beautiful baby is going to have to wear a bulky unattractive accessory. It is a total vanity thing, and that makes me feel super guilty. I know things can be worse and I am grateful it is just a cosmetic issue. I am fighting through this guilt and working on getting over it. She will still be adorable and it isn't my fault (allegedly).
Her fitting is in 5 days. We should get the helmet about 2 weeks after that. Just this week she started pulling off her hats and headbands. This helmet will be an adjustment for both of us.
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